Recently I’ve had some friends come to me with friends newly diagnosed with breast cancer, asking me what they should do?  How can they help?  I can only say the first few days of a breast cancer diagnosis are a terrifying time in a life.  I am sure that sounds dramatic but it is unfortunately true–whether I wanted to feel it or not I was certain I was going to die. Suddenly grocery shopping lists and dry cleaning pick ups were so imperceptible they almost disappeared altogether–who cares about shopping when I may be dying? So when my friends ask me what they can do to help I tell them three simple words–just show up.  And when you do, meet  your friends where they are.  If they’re scared, hold their hand. If they’re nervous, be a calming presence. If they’re calm, you be calm, too.  Just don’t tell them how to feel–find out how they feel and meet them where they are.  Whatever happens, your friend may walk a lonely breast cancer path but thanks to you, they most certainly will not walk it alone.

Posted May 18th, 2010 by